Just saw the most HILARIOUS thing on eBay. Someone is selling a Weight Watchers 10% Keyring. Now why would anyone buy that? The seller is very persuasive:
Went to Weight Watchers? Did you loose 10% of your body weight? Then you would have received a Keyring. Comes in red presentation box Postage and packaging is charged at a fixed rate of 55p (UK).
Hmm. It's tempting. And international bidders are welcome too! So even if you haven't lost 10% of your body weight, or even if you've never set foot in a WW meeting in your life… NOW'S YOUR CHANCE TO FAKE IT!
. . .
On Wednesday I clomped up the 530 steps to the top of St Paul's Cathedral. As I stood out there on the balcony, pinned up against the wall by sheer terror and the icy London wind, it occurred to me that if I'd been here a few years before there's no way I'd have made it up those steps at all, let alone without a single huff or puff. Oh yes. I felt rather smug and proud.
Until, of course, I had to climb back down those 530 steps. I fucking hate walking down steps. Is there any -phobic word for a Fear of Descents? I don't have a problem with the upward part of the journey. But whether it's a mountain, staircase or escalator, I turn into a trembling freak coming back down. Perhaps it's a leftover from my Very Large Days when my belly rolls were so big that I couldn't see my feet. The reward for the labourious climbing a great height is meant to be the speedier descent, but that ain't the case for me. I picked my way down, one hand squeezing the life out of the bannister, the other clawing at the wall. All smugness gone!
. . .
I loved everyone's End of Year Review/NY Resolution entries. Holy optimism and determination, Batman! I've been so absorbed that I haven't got round to making my own list. Some ideas were so great I'm gonna poach em for myself.
In terms of Lard Busting, my real new year actually starts on January 15, which is the date I started the journey back in 2001. So I will reflect on the fat then.
But in terms of 2005 in general, it was bloody wild!
On this day last year, I was simply shitting my pants. My visa was rapidly running out and my fate was uncertain. Would Scottish Companion do something as insane as propose to and marry a twit like me? Or would I be deported back to Australia? It all seemed so bloody hopeless. I never imagined than in 2005 I would end up:
- getting that proposal just four days later, in the middle of the night
- quitting my shitty second job
- moving house
- eloping in Las Vegas… twice!
- staring down into the Grand Canyon
- holidaying in San Francisco
- running a 5k race
- being published in a book
- being photographed for a national UK magazine
- having my mug being splashed in a Sunday tabloid
- traumatically having my secret fat life outed to my colleagues due to Sunday tabloid
- celebrating the weddings twice more, in Scotland and Australia
- writing a story for Cosmopolitan
It just sounds hilarious and surreal that all that could happen to me, especially when I still feel like the dorky farmgirl from Nowhere, New South Wales. But I am glad I still feel like the dork, otherwise I doubt I'd have relished the adventures half as much.
But where to from here? I worry I have used my Adventure Quota for the next decade, but I know things only get boring if you let them. I also don't believe in resting on your laurels for too long. Fair enough a wee bit of New Years reflection, but after that… new goals and gettin' on with it! I will let you know when I've got my list.
2005 was also a damn fine year in Blogland. I read fatblogs in the morning when I am usually daydreaming about croissants or melted cheese (or both, together). But once I've read a few entries about people doing healthy things it's usually enough to get my brain back on track. "Well if X is eating spinach and Y has been to the gym twice already this week, then I can hardly go to the vending machine, can I? CAN I?!".
I am best motivated by fear and envy.
Thank you to every blog writer and reader and friend for just being round this year. Cheers for your emails, comments and ideas. And an honourable mention to the sweet generous souls who sent wedding gifts. It was such a buzz, bringing this virtual life into the real world. Every small appliance has been put to good use.
(And a side note to Ann whose suggestion to meet up in London I did not see until I was BACK from London – sorry I missed that, dude! I couldn't find an email address on your site…)
Here's a few more honourable mentions:
Mistress Julia – The Running Goddess. She was so generous with her time and advice in virtually coaching me from Slug to 5K Runner in eight gruelling weeks. She has been patient and wise, especially during my Dodgy Knee troubles.
(She also sent me two brand new bras that she'd bought but didn't fit her. They are sooo fancy and lacy, and they make my boobs all perky like those 1950s babes in the tight sweaters. How could you not love someone who can make your boobs look great all the way from Italy?)
Jillian – Reader Extraordinaire. After cultivating a nice email friendship, she generously invited SC and I to stay with her in San Francisco, showing us around the town with great flair and imagination, introducing us to burritos and sushi and just generally being kind, generous and oodles of good fun. Next to Melbourne, San Francisco is just my favourite city in the world and I know most of that is due to the Jillian and Greg Welcoming Committee. Cheers, mate!
And similar thanks to Tree who met up with us in Melbourne. She gave us a whirlwind tour, plied us with great tips on what to do and more importantly where to eat; and was even more warm and witty than she is en blog. Woohoo!
Kathryn – I have read Kathryn's non-fat writing for years but it was only 2005 that I discovered iDiet. She worked her arse off and overcome some major hurdles. And she updates regularly! It's like a free daily Kick Up The Arse when you can read someone who's just getting on with it. Good on ya, Kathryn.
Argy – For just being herself, the one and only.
YP – For showing me that it's all about hard work and just getting on with it. She rules.
Nicole – The Anonymous Fit Woman. Smart, insightful, and owner of the most stunning eyes. I wish she lived closer so I could ask her for make-up lessons!
Meg – I devoured her every word this year. She had so many lightbulb moments that I stole for myself. Score! She is a great writer and hella funny.
I could go on for another fifteen paragraphs but this entry is huge as it is. Just remember, if I haven't mentioned you doesn't mean I don't think you rawk. I mean, look at the size of my freaking blogroll. I get around!
Happy new year tigers, and all the best to you. Let's squeeze as much out of 2006 as possible. Woo!