Think Thin!

I’m getting out the measuring cups, folks. I have officially declared this Watch Your Portions Week. I don’t have a problem eating the right kinds of foods, just a problem with eating too much of them. I am sure my brown rice portion is more suited to a family of four. A family of four gorillas. If gorilla families ate brown rice, that is.

Today I bought a small loaf of rye bread, a chunky doorstop of a thing. If you threw it at somebody’s head it might be fatal. I’ve always wanted to try the stuff, it looks so wholesome in a potential-deadly-weapon sort of way. But I toasted a thin slice and it was actually alright, although a little chewy. It went down nicely with an egg and spinach and grilled tomatoes and mushies. Hubba hubba.

In Scale news: there is no news. But I shall keep on keeping on! The exercise is alright and if I can get a handle on these portion sizes something will happen soon. I am feeling less flabby in the belly region so right now that’s good enough for me.

. . .

Thursday nights are sacred at Chez Dietgirl, well at least the precious minutes between 7.10 and 8 PM. The classic 60s series The Avengers is on BBC Four and we always tune in. It’s kitschy and hilarious and Gareth gets to perve on Diana Rigg as Emma Peel in her shiny leather trousers.

Last week’s episode was intriguingly titled, "How to Succeed… At Murder!" and featured a gang of Killer Secretaries that would bump off their bosses and take over their businesses. They would all meet up at HQ for briefings and fitness classes. You need more than shorthand to be a good killer secretary. There’s ballet and Strangulation 101 too.

Anyway, there was this fantastic sign in the classroom with the Killer Secretaries motto:

Sign

THINK THIN
TO BE SLIM IS TO BE SUCCESSFUL
NUBILITY = PROSPERITY

I thought of all the good folks in Fatblog Land and our constant search for words of motivation, so here are some more grainy screenshots.

Blondie

Blondie Secretary here strangled one guy with her stocking and shot another with a gun-shaped charm on her charm bracelet that was actually a REAL gun! All while thinking THIN!

Emma

Meanwhile our heroine Emma Peel doesn’t seem convinced by the sloganeering. She may be nubile, but working top secret for the British government hasn’t made her particularly prosperous.

Thin4

Here our hero John Steed is surrounded by leotard-wearing weapon-weilding Killer Secretaries. What is the collective noun for a bunch of Killer Secretaries? A tippex of Killer Secretaries? A memo? A staple? A shredder of Killer Secretaries? Anyway, power in slender numbers, gals!

Now even if you harbour no ambition to become a Killer Secretary, I’m sure you’ll agree these are words of wisdom and inspiration that can help you on your own lard-busting journey. A motto for life!

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33 thoughts on “Think Thin!

  1. Wow, Killer Secretaries… cool.

    I miss the BBC shows we watch… Dr. Who and Torchwood. Torchwood we have to download – it’s not on over here (they’d have to put it on like HBO or seriously edit it – we can’t curse on regular TV in this stodgy country). Dr. Who is on the Sci Fi channel, so we can watch it… but we usually download it anyway, cuz otherwise we have to wait months to see what you are seeing!

  2. That’s one awesome recap 🙂 That must be my problem, I’ve been forgetting to “Think Thin”. I can just imagine hanging that sign over my desk!

  3. Hi! I found your blog through the Mpls Star-Tribune (and was not scared away by the frank language, ha ha). Inspiring and fun to read! Way to go on your diet and life in general!

  4. Ah, portions…those sneaky buggers have a nasty habit of getting bigger and bigger if you don’t watch them carefully.

    Ballet and strangulation? Interesting combination.

  5. I’m oldest enough to remember watching The Avengers, live and in black and white. And of course Emma Peel was every young boy’s dream girl.

    And I’d like to declare this “Watch Your Portion” Decade. I just think that it is impossible to watch your portions in America especially when you’re eating out.

    Everybody — nutritionists, the government, McDonald’s, diet books,everybody — tells us that we are the problem when it comes to portion sizes.

    I think (see my blog) that the blame is incorrectly placed on us.

  6. I eat the right foods just the wrong amounts. It is hard to get srvings down especially when you are use to the servings we get today. I am using smaller bowls and plates and hopefully that will help fool my eyes into thinking I am eating the same amount. Have a good week:)

  7. Portions is one of those skills I seem to master well–until suddenly I don’t. My ‘palm-sized’ 3 oz slice ends up looking more like Andre the Giant’s palms. My cup of my hand serving of pasta becomes an avalanche. I feel ya Diet Girl.

  8. kathryn – indeed! Dial M for Murdering the English language!

    nikhila – hell yeah! i have big hands but i think i am acting like i have shaquille o’neal hands or something.

    K – indeedy! i got a weird referral in my stats this morning and the link only gave the first few words of the story (talking about PastaQueen) so I emailled PQ and she went out in the snow and bought a copy of the paper and scanned it in… GROOVEH!

    i have to scoot to bed but thanks for the comments everyone… take care

  9. WOW Shauna!! The Wall Street Journal!! Now you’ve really hit the big time. How many hits a day can you cope with? 🙂

    I loved this entry. It made me smile. NJ

  10. I loved this entry. I think you’re right about watching your portions. There’s really no other way to be sure you’ll lose weight. Congrats on the WSJ article.

  11. I’m with you on the gorilla family-sized portion of brown rice. *sigh* But it’s GOOD stuff, ya know?

    I love that diet mantra, I’ll have to remember it when I go to eat some chocolate! I’ll chant “Nubility! Prosperity!” Oh my!

    Congrats on the WSJ! How cool is that?!?!

    Sherry

  12. I THINK THIN all the FLIPPIN’ TIME but all that goes when I’m confronted with mock duck and mock pork. Mock meat makes me mental. Guess what I just had for dinner?

    Anyways DG, I will write a big post this week about the JOYS of Polar watches to answer your question a few days ago over in cranky land…

    Chow chow for now SISTA!

  13. maybe murdering rich bosses burns more calories than we could possibly imagine@!!!! I’m ony podgy because i am doing the wrong damn exercise! Don’t worry about portion sizes DG – just go knock someone off!

  14. Wouldn’t the Killer Secretaries be a great name for a band? I love that sign! I think perhaps a pool of secretaries might be good although as a secretary myself, I lean towards a gaggle.

    Portion control is always a problem and I’m always amazed what the manufacturers call a serving. (Pop-Tarts is a classic example. One sleeve does not constitute a serving.)

    Thanks for the recap of that Avengers show. It’s too good! Perhaps if I had followed their example, I’d be a provost by now.

  15. Would it be a ditto of killer secretaries?
    **I hope you aren’t too young to remember dittos – if you are they were used to make copies before modern photocopiers.**

  16. Ooooh, Wall St Journal… noice!

    I am exactly the same with the portion sizes… I rarely eat junk but have been known to consume four pieces of toast with avocado and tomato for breakfast… eeek!

    Hope you’re having a great week

    xo

  17. you can never be too rich or too thin 😉 well, you know what i mean. my favourite shows at the moment are entourage, heroes, and the it crowd. i’m jealous you’re in scotland!!! i LOVE belle and sebastian (esp stevie!!!)!!! keep up the good work!

  18. Actually, many of the gorillas I know really dig brown rice. The Killer Secretaries think it’s too carb-rich, though.

  19. Cheers for the link DG 😀

    I didn’t even know The Avengers was being re-run – I’ll be tuning in now too, especially if they continue the motivational messages ;o)

  20. Get a breadmaker. Not only do you get the smell of baking bread in your kitchen with minimal work (i.e. even I can do it, though I’ve only done it once and Neil’s mum is the main put flour and yeast and water in machine person), you know exactly what is going into your bread and you can make all sorts of yummy wholegrain and nut and fruit and EVERYTHING I’m surprised it doesn’t make you a cup of tea.

  21. ohhh andrea! i have always wanted to have a breadmaker but it is far tooo tooo dangerous. me and fresh bread don’t mix. actually we mix too well, me eating hunk after hunk of warm bread and it all mixing down in my belly. hehehe!

  22. I (due to scary new schedule) dont have time to watch tv *sigh*

    hope the portion control does the trick and that you do break the last few pounds. go go go! 😀

    ps. i LOVE Bodypump. its awsome. have a class tonight. althogh due to yoga just missed tuesdays class. and i can get over how friendly the ppl in my gym are.

    when i worked in Aus on a pearl boat they had two bread makers and the smell was totally devine!!!

  23. It just goes to show how powerful portion control is.

    You eat small meals throughout the day you become thin thin.

    Awesome job and I loved reading your post.

  24. You know what? Your blog has made my English so much more interesting and versatile 😀 I constantly catch myself using the phrases and words you use. I really, really appreciate it. So in return I’d like to teach you a phrase in Finnish you might find useful and I use often, always with a laugh tho, I think some of the phrases especially the sport commentators use are RIDICILOUS and that’s the charm of them!

    So here we go: if you are really surprised by a turn or twist in a conversation or actually in any situation and you hear something that you didn’t expect to hear or see happen, as a Finn you would say; “now THAT really came behind a tree” translating into Finnish: “no toi tuli kyllä ihan puun takaa”. Equal to “I didn’t see that one coming” but with an interesting link of Finland being very woody (a lot of forests here).

    Another good one is when your not in a hurry: “we’re not riding on a rabbit” in Finnish: “ei olla jäniksen selässä”. I use it quite often and ALWAYS amuse myself 😀