How I didn’t make my millions

I don't like to live a life of regrets but I'm a little gutted that I never got around to developing my Treadmill Desk concept way back in 2002. I'd been bitching about how many hours a week I was desk-bound and how it rendered my exercise efforts redundant – I'd calculated that for every hour of exercise, I spent ten sitting on my arse.

My brilliant solution was this Treadmill Desk thingy. I created a stunning artists impression using the best graphics software of the age, Microsoft Paint:

Now what do you know, eight years later some clever bastard has had the same idea but actually made it a reality. Behold, the Trek Desk!

Trekdesk
They've been on The Today Show with it and everything!

This discovery was quite crushing as it served to highlight my chronic inability to carpe diem.

And eight years later I am STILL a desk-bound office monkey with a disgruntled expression.

And I went to a wedding last weekend wearing a dress eerily similar to the one in my illustration.

Dash it all!

Disclaimer for the humourless: the tongue is in the cheek here. Please don't send emails saying I should have got a patent or my concept is nothing like the TrekDesk etc etc etc!

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42 thoughts on “How I didn’t make my millions

  1. My boss was telling me about some scheme the government are introducing over the next couple of years that will make exercise at work mandatory! Employers can be fined if their staff put on weight!

  2. I’d have to get out off my chair to sue LaLa, that’s far too much effort 😛

    @Helen – that is insane!

    @debbie – that would have been a great selling point. mwahaha.

  3. Imagine how cool that’d be in meetings – you know those dreary ones where people are kinda nodding off? This would keep the conversation going – once everyone was fit enough to walk and talk 🙂

  4. It reminds me of the foot-mouse my husband thought was the cure all for RSI……was shattered when I told him I saw one in those ‘book clubs’ that turn up in the office every now and then.

  5. Can I custom order your design though? Eff the TrekDesk.

    Fun(ish) fact, when I worked at a hospital I actually did use a laptop on a stick, er, well, on a stand with wheels anyway.

  6. Maybe you could design a wine crushing machine so that you can stomp grapes while u work and at the end, you have made your own merlot for after work drinks : P

  7. Wow these look pretty cool. They must have totally stolen your idea, I would sue! Lol!!! Btw I love your drawing, the dress is stunning!

  8. But I can face-plant on an ordinary treadmill – imagine how much damage (to myself and the world) I could do on this!

  9. You can always improve upon it by figuring out how to make it so your computer only works if you’re going fast enough to charge it. Actually, it would be good if you could rig up a TV that way to some sort of exercise equipment.

  10. I think the potential for harming myself, those around me and office equipment is far too high. Maybe an exercise bike though…

  11. Damn, Damn, Damn. Sorry they stole your idea and you didn’t get rich off your brilliant idea. I spent the past 27 years working an office job and I have the ass to prove it. I really need one of those Trek Desks at my next job.

  12. (sigh)shauna, shauna, shauna…nope that’s it. LOL!

    shauntay (yeah, it’s me AGAIN)
    the LBC,southern CA

  13. you KNOW shauna, on second thought–you MIGHT wanna consider getting together with charlene (post #17). her concept is far more utilitarian. y’all can be bizness partners. of course you would be in charge of designing the marketing materials, you know, with your “eye” for color. did i mention your FLAIR for creativity? you know me, i believe in stating the obvious. we’ll call it the “Wine Press-n-Step-n-Type” or something to that effect. well, anyway, you get the idea…

    so,look, don’t sweat it. the shreck, um, i mean, TREK desk ain’t got shite on you.

    p.s. and will you lookit that?? easiest 10 calories i ever burned. take THAT trek desk!!!

  14. I did know a vice president of a very large corp that had a standing desk once – no chair – and he swore by it

    the treadmill lap top thing looks like a way to do two things, half assed, at the same time.

  15. Oh but Shauna, I was waiting all through the article to send you an email commenting on how you should have patented your idea, etc etc. Dang! 😉

  16. I’m a nurse and back in the mid 80’s when I first graduated from nursing school was when HIV was new and scary territory. I kept saying as I worked, I should invest in a glove company or a liquid soap company. We didn’t use gloves for everything in healthcare then like they do now and we still used bar soap in patient’s rooms…ARGH!. Then I thought up the idea of a small swimming pool that has an automatic current that you swim against..uh, they came out around that time in real life. I’m just a step behind.

  17. I love the post, and as always, your witty take on life! I so wish you’d write another book Shauna! Pretty please????

  18. that is SUCH a bummer. i’d be cross for days. and resentful that i dont get one at work.

  19. Sorry I think I just accidentally hit the post key when not finished… anyway that diagram really cheered me up. It looks just like me actually!

  20. Your treadmill is way cooler! Why would I want a full desktop? All that space would just give me a place to put, you know, actual work stuff. (Your “laptop only” design is more “Farmville” friendly. LOL!) ~Lisa~

  21. I feel your pain. I am convinced I created not only singles on disc (back in the day before MP3’s) but also coffee bags (like tea bags but with coffee in them).

  22. OMG loved the grape-crushing, lit up my day and got me out of my head. Btw, there’s a website about a DIY version and the guy walked from Maine to Florida or across the US over a year/working. On a different note, I think exercise is more helpful when it’s endorphin producing than the minimal burn, but thats JMO.

  23. I saw that and honestly? I doubt I’d get work done properly. I’d just want to increase the speed and go faster and then start jogging and then all of a sudden it’s lunch time and I’ve gotten nothing done…hehe.

    Or it could be the best thing since sliced bread. Who knows? I know that my company will probably be the LAST place to get one hehe.