Bloody Annoying Things About Being Fat

  1. Socks. They just don't bloody stay up.
  2. No matter how fancy your haircut is, your face is still puffy.
  3. The swish swish of your thighs.

There are heaps of other things, but I am too lazy to list them right now. Hehe.

Anyway, this week I've been walking to work. It's only 15 or so minutes each way, but good lord sometimes I find that walk damn hard. Maybe it's because I am pounding the pavement, but I can feel it right up the back of my calves and my thighs. Twang! Ping! Pow!

Perhaps it's true what they say, that walking really is the best exercise there is. I think I need to incorporate more walking into my exercise routine. Now that I don't have a dog, I don't walk half as much as I used to.

I am really loving my Body Combat class again, despite being really really bad at it. Did I mention that when I went off the rails, I didn't go to the gym for over three months? When I finally returned, I'd totally lost my fitness. I used to be able to run and punch and kick for the entire class, not skip a beat. I kept up with those svelte bitches, I tells ya.

But now I find I am stopping to catch my breath, shuffling pathetically from one foot to the other, moaning like a harpooned whale, when I should be doing jaunty scissor steps. And this is an improvement since I first returned 4 weeks ago. Back then I thought I would plain collapse.

It's such a frustrating and sinking feeling to realise you have wasted so much time. Thrown away something that I worked so hard for. And paid for! God, three months gym membership wasted! But I can't turn back the clock. All I can do now is stay focused and not dwell on what was a pretty rough period in my life.

What else can you do but be kind to yourself?

I am going well with the eating, too. Things have been trimmed back back to basics. It's something I've wanted to do for a long time, but lacked the incentive to do so. Now with the weekly weigh-ins, I want to stick to it and be a good girl. Almost everything I eat is fresh and whole. No more packaged or processed crap. The most processed I get is a can of tuna or a Cruskit. It's all very simplified now. Even when I was following WW last year, I was eating so much hidden sugar and processed chemical artificial shit with all those "diet" foods.

Some days it is bloody difficult, but I know from experience the only thing I can do is go cold turkey. Remember last year when I "quit chocolate"? I went over nine months without a skerrick of it. And if my stupid progress chart was online, you could see that I stopped losing steadily when I started eating it again, even when it was just a small bit each week.

I guess I just have one of those "all or nothing" personalities. I can't just have one itty scoop of icecream. I have to eat the whole tub. And maybe wash it down with a bar of Cadbury's! So for now, I am just going to train my tastebuds to do without it.

It seems to be working okay so far. I had another weigh-in on Tuesday and I'd lost another 3.5 kilograms. This is over two weeks, mind you, and I was flu-ridden for the second week, so I am sure it's a bit of a fluke. But I've now lost over 8 kilos of the pork I gained back.

So I'm on my way now! I am happy with my progress but while ever there's clothes in my wardrobe that I can't fit in to, I won't be happy, coz I know I've been smaller than I am now. But rather that getting cranky at myself, I'll try to channel that into determination and improved kicking and punching!

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