The Honeymoon Is Over

After spending the majority of this year faffing around with weddings, the fun is officially over. Now it’s onto married life. Sorting out the spare room, mortgages, fixing cars, deciding whether or not we should buy a tumble dryer. Borrrrrrrring!

The other night I dreamed my mother told me that all the guests had bitched about me at our Aussie wedding. About how I claimed to be this dazzling weight loss success story, swanning around in books and fancy magazines, yet I didn’t look any different from when I left Australia. They’d all expected me to have been far smaller. In fact, it was obvious to everyone that I still needed to lose an arseload of weight. Basically I was a fraud!

I woke up so upset and angry that I almost called my mother to see if it was true. Then I remembered it was just a dream, fuelled by paranoia and guilt, since Id accumulated some extra pudge in Australia. I was so overjoyed on the first day of the trip when I bought three pairs of pants (that’s trousers to you Brits) in a size 14 and a bunch of tops in Medium. Woohoo! I nearly wept with glee, I never thought I’d ever see a 14 on the label. But after three and a bit weeks of rolling around in the succuclent Australian food baskets, the pants got extremely snug.

But I have no regrets. Ohhh I loved every mouthful. I had made a pact with myself only to eat the things I really wanted – the stuff I’d truly missed while living in the UK. The only problem it turned out I’d truly missed a helluva lot of stuff. Kingston biscuits, Cherry Ripes, Cadbury’s Top Deck, Vietnamese food, Baker’s Delight, sausage rolls, fresh orange juice, mangoes, cheese, Jatz crackers, Smith’s chips, $20 giant sushi platters, papaya salad, sweet potato chips, cheap avocados, Turkish banquets, fish and chips on the beach, al fresco cooked breakfasts, juice bars, Milo, steak sandwiches, pineapples from a roadside stall, luscious non-greasy pizza, fresh and lean burgers, passionfruit cheesecake, roast pumpkin, astoundingly good hot chocolate, multigrain English muffins, fruit smoothies, chocolate wedding cake, my grandmother’s caramel slice…

Oh man. I could go on, but I won’t. I’m all emotional just thinking about it. Sniff. It’s not the delicious meals themselves so much as the gobsmacking freshness of it all. And eating outdoors with the sun on my skin. And eating with much-missed family and friends. And eating because it so bloody cheap! Every time we go for a meal in Scotland I end up cranky because we have paid so much for what often is a crushing disappointment, Β£25 for a pathetic sliver of meat in a piddly sauce that tastes like it came from a jar.

Okay I am making it sound worse than it is, but my memory is currently tainted by oodles of happy Australian memories. I do love Scotland, really I do. I’m sure I’ll get over this soon!

As bloated as the menu sounds above, I am reasonably happy with how I ate. I was content to refresh my memory with just one sausage roll, one piece of wedding cake, one Cheesymite scroll from Baker’s Delight – as opposed to multiples. Except for my grandmother’s caramel slice. I ate about six bits of that. Oooh it’s so tasty! And she cuts it into tiny wee inch squares so you kid yourself you haven’t eaten much. Evil old dame.

But like I said, back to reality. I was back at the gym within two hours of getting off the plane. Have you ever lifted weights after flying for 28 hours? I almost fell asleep in the squat track, which could have lead to some permanent damage. I also kept my weights as heavy as my last class – which was four weeks ago. Oww oww oww. I was crippled for the rest of the week, so it’s only tonight I’ll be properly back into the cardio. I have gained just under three kilos so I’ve got some serious work to do in order to de-snug those Size 14 Pants O’ Joy.

I’ll write more about the trip soon, and I promise to scan that Cosmo story!

30 thoughts on “The Honeymoon Is Over

  1. welcome back! sounds like you had a dream time with your family and all those beloved memories in munchables. its tough being so far away from home sometimes but then it helps to remember why and then cuddle him close πŸ™‚
    hope your muscles recover quickly!!

  2. welcome back

    am I the only one thinking that under 3 kilos for a month vacation is like nothing? I think you have been really good. You can also see it this way. When you were bigger 3 kilos here and there didnt really matter that much when you tried on clothes! You had to lose alot more then that to get into a new size and now you are so tiny so you whine like hte skinny girls oohh I gained 3 kilos and I cant fit into any pants at all *L*. That is excellent!

  3. Welcome home!! You don’t have Vietnamese food in Scotland?!?! Oh my stars I would suffer serious withdrawal if I couldn’t walk into my favourite Vietnamese restaurant and order my #50 satay. There’s one on every corner in this city…

  4. Welcome back – I hope you had a great trip. 3kg is a good number to increase in those 4 weeks away. I think if I smelt half of the things you ate I would gain twice that amount!!! Good to have you back.

  5. I’m having to wipe the drool off my face as I read your post. The food sounds amazing and far more appetizing than the cafeteria-style meal I had for lunch.

  6. Sounds like you had a fabulous time. Think I may move to Scotland so that I am not tempted by the food. LOL. There is an abundance here isn’t there. We are so lucky.

    With your killer attitude you will be back in those great pants before you know it.

    Good to see you back πŸ™‚

  7. So you had a nice time, then πŸ˜‰

    Well done for getting back to exercising so quickly – most people would’ve used the journey as the perfect excuse to slack for a bit. I don’t see the holiday squish sticking for very long.

    We saved up our best weather for your coming back, did you notice…

  8. Oh man, food porn galore! *Wipes drool off chin* I think you just spiked my sugar level, was it good for you too?! ;D Welcome back, I look forward to reading all the gory details of your fab trip!


  9. I cannot believe you managed the gym so soon after getting off the plane! My first trip home: I tried to work the day after we arrived home and found I was so lightheaded I had to go home again. Now I always plan for a couple of slob days to get over the jet-lag.
    Did SC enjoy the Aussie experience?
    Don’t worry about the 3 kg (seems so little when I think of all the Cherry Ripes I could have scoffed) – my slimming world leader always says holiday gains go quickly because it hasn’t latched on properly yet.

  10. Welcome back! Sounds like a great trip, it must take some time to adjust to normal life again. Oo I wish I lived in australia – living close to North Pole, I hear you on the lack of fresh produce…I can’t wait to see the Cosmo article!

  11. Baker’s Delight, Milo, Vietnamese Food, sigh. Sounds like my trips back home when I eat my way through memories. Mine include passionfruit and sliced banana topped Greek yoghurt at the Central market in Adelaide.

    Way impressed with the exercising, I’m tempted to call off after a trip to California! (I’m in NJ these days)

  12. Thanks for sharing your wonderful story. it’s really inspiring… Specially to me ’cause I’m trying to lose weight. Just like you did.

  13. Oh man, am I hungry now! You do realise that about half the food you mentioned is pretty damn healthy – all the fresh fruit and vegies.

    I know what you mean about Vietnamese food, I thought even the food in Vietnam wasn’t as good as we get here!

  14. Hey
    Just stumbled across your site as a 21 year old girl also trying to lose weight… i’m from New Zealand (or is it ‘Noi Zoilund’) but studying in Vancouver on exchange. I just started trying to lose weight, joining Weight (Whale!) Watchers 2 weeks ago, but am finding the comfort in food when I miss home or have a big essay due hard to handle.
    Sometimes I just get so upset and obsessed about eating – it’s cool reading how candid you are, gives me a bit of perspective.
    Keep going, I thought the latest pictures of you were fab.

  15. I found I felt the same way last year when we went to the US. I hadn’t been there in so long I decided to let myself eat all the things I missed. I came back around 4 kilos heavier, but if I had it to do all over again, I’d do the same. I still miss my mother’s home cooking and all the wonderful things you can get in the US that you can’t get here in OZ. Did you upload new pics? I’m going over to see now. Glad you had a nice trip, I’m sad I didn’t get the chance to meet you.

  16. Hey DG! You are my hero. Hi to all other passers-by!

    I actually got here after reading the Cosmo article. DG is great, an inspiration. Does anyone know a good blog site where i can start my blog and hopefully diet too.

    kisses to all ladies!

  17. By the way, you look beautiful in Cosmo! Really pretty. I forgot to say that before.

    And seems like this is blogRolling. cool

  18. hey chicken! i am sooooooo excited! I think that I am coming to Glasgow next year for the world championship bagpipe competition – are you up for a little expensive dinner which tastes like its from a jar with me?

    WHat if i promise to pick up some of your nan’s slice and a packet of tim tams?

  19. Your photo is gorgeous. You have accomplished so much. So what that it is all about your weight. You are an inspiration to so many. I have 130 pounds to lose, I’ve taken off about 35 since 11/04. When I start to feel as though I can’t possible do this anymore, I go to your site and find the humor in the situation. Please don’t ever think that what you’ve accomplished is trivial. Your hobby is your fan base, keeping us entertained and on the weight loss track. And if you want to write about something other than weight, you’ve traveled and lived such an interesting life, and believe me, the first few years of marriage always have so many stories to tell, then comes the kids and pta meetings, see what I’m getting at, all our lives are ordinary, but that’s what makes us us. Anyway, thanks for your thoughts and your updates. Have a great day!

Comments are now closed on all Dietgirl posts. For fresh conversation please visit me at