O joy! The gospel of Fage Total Greek Yogurt is spreading ever further throughout the land, particularly after a very swanky ad in New York Magazine. Here in the UK, I spied it in this month's Red, named as a fabulous alternative to mealy, over-processed diet yogurts.
Hopefully this will mean more 2% in the shops so I'll no longer have to wrestle old ladies for the last tub. I admit it, I'm hopelessly addicted. But Greek yogurt just makes life worth so much brighter. Well, creamier.
You see I once was a fool for sour cream. One of my favourite foods used to be this white trash French onion dip – in which you mix a packet of dried French onion soup with a tub of sour cream. I used to eat a whole tub of that on my own, with a whole box of Jatz crackers. Sitting home alone wondering what would become of me. Those were the days.
But my waistline has enjoyed some respite since Argy put me on to Total. It works the same magic on that dip (which I now prefer to share with friends) without the artery-clogging properties. It's also a dream dolloped onto a bean burrito or into a bowl of chili or pumpkin soup.
And it works just as well with sweet things. Like on Sunday when Gareth insisted he didn't want a birthday cake as he wanted to stay svelte for all his sporty activities. But I said, what's a birthday without FLAMES?
So I got some meringue nests from M&S (just 50 cals each, rah!) and spooned in some yogurt then chucked on some chunks of kiwi, strawberries and fresh pineapple on top and
flooded lightly drizzled with raspberry sauce.
(Tangent – how good are fresh pineapples!? It's been years since I bought one. It was on sale for £1 and bloody beautiful)
Then I just stabbed the meringue with some candles. Flaming miniature birthday pavlova! The picture is a bit dodgy because I was in a hurry – waxy yogurt is not tasty. And yes, apparently Gareth turned four years old.
Anyway, I can't help thinking of that old Seinfeld episode in which the gang get hooked on the yogurt from a non-fat frozen yogurt shop. Suddenly they're all stacking on the weight, so they send a sample off for some scientific tests and it turns out – gasp – the non-fat yogurt isn't non-fat at all!
I know Fage Total Greek has been around for eighty years but there's still part of me that's very paranoid and pessimistic. That's the part that believes if something seems too good to be true then it usually is, that there's no way I could enjoy something so indulgent without terrible repercussions, that all good things must come to end, that every rose has its thorn, etcetera etcetera. So I'm half-expecting that one gloomy day I'll open the paper to the shocking headline TOTAL 2% ACTUALLY TOTALLY LARDY!
But then there's the positive thinking me that trusts in a good Nutritional Information panel. Pass the tub.