Sermon on the Blog

Sermon Last week I got emails from three different people saying they'd dug up an entry from four years ago called Things I Have Learned.

I re-read it myself and found it very reassuring, like the Ghost of Shauna's Past telling me DUDE we've been here before so don't you worry bout a thing!

In light of the aforementioned mushy brain I thought I would re-post it today for the new-school readers.

2006 Disclaimer:  This is not smug lecturing or advice or a dietary Sermon on the Mount. It's just a wee list of lessons learned over the last five years. And so many of em took almost all that time to learn. I'm a bit slow.

Disclaimer Update 2010:  Yep. Still learnin'!

  • Laugh at yourself. Especially when you screw things up!
  • Don't compare your progress to other bloggers, instead be inspired by them (ie. steal their ideas!)
  • Try to reduce the self-loathing. I'm not saying you have to look in the mirror and chant, "YOU ARE A WINNER!", but it really doesn't help to stand around yelling at your thighs.
  • Remember that the weight loss industry exists to make money, whether it's Weight Watchers or Slimming Magazine or the CSIRO or Dr Gillian McKeith. Even though they all help in their own ways, they don't have all the answers and they really want you to buy the Choco Crisp Bars or send away for the Pilates DVD. Take bits and pieces from what they tell you and clobber it together to make your own way of doing things. Don't let anything be a substitute for thinking for yourself.
  • Don't put things off until you Get Skinny. Try something crazy and new. If you fail, just don't blog about it!
  • Deal with The Past.
  • Look at the Big Picture or look at the Little Picture. Whichever is easiest to stomach at the time!
  • Don't disappear up your own arse. Losing weight seems to bring a lot of introspection and lightbulb moments, but don't let this journey take over your life.
  • Accept that you are moody, inconsistent and full of contradictions. What worked for you yesterday may shit you to tears tomorrow, and for no reasonable reason!
  • Never eat lentils before you do squats or lunges.
  • Just because you think everything is about your weight, don't assume everyone else sees it that way. Often other people are much better at seeing past your fat than you are.
  • Just because you lose weight doesn't mean your old fears and problems will disappear. Example: If you were scared of rollercoasters when you were 350lb you may still shit your pants at the thought of them 160 pounds later!
  • Total Greek Yogurt is the best thing to come out of Greece since Plato.
  • Things won't change overnight. It takes time, trial and error to forge a healthy lifestyle and figure out what works for you. The difficulty of this task increases by tenfold increments depending on how many times per week you used to visit McDonalds Drive Thru.
  • Don't let the fear of loose skin, belly rolls or flabby arms stop you. Do you think Oprah worried about her bingo wings? No. She just flap-flap-flapped and flew away to world domination!
  • If you're still worried about your flabby arms, move to Scotland. You can get away with long sleeves for about 364 days a year.
  • Even when you royally screw up – over and over and over again – you can pick yourself up again. As long you never stop believing you will get there in the end.

43 thoughts on “Sermon on the Blog

  1. wow, hey, Shauna, how’d you know I needed this RIGHT NOW? I’m really struggling with myself at the moment (3 months on a plateau and the self-talk is getting worse), not with staying on plan but with the negativity towards myself. All these things I know but somehow my brain is busy trying to sabotage me into feeling like I will never reach the goal (rubbish, I know!).

    And thanks, I nearly spit out my water about Fage πŸ™‚ (love the stuff!)

  2. I love this post this time just as much, perhaps more, than when you originally posted it. It was just what I needed to read today. As always, I’m so grateful you continue to blog.

  3. Oh how did you get so wise???? I definitely needed this – my sense of perspective is waaaay out of whack at the moment, but there is light, and my little fight with the scales (and everything else in life) is not the end of the world. Ta muchly!

  4. Funny and oh-so- true!!!!! Thanks for re-posting it!

    Doesn’t desk work just suck the entire life outta ya??? Both physically and mentally (so much so that I cannot even spell anymore)……

    back to my desk………………….

  5. Don’t think of it as “lazy”…it’s “eco-friendly” (recycling, that is). Love the list and it’s still as clever today as the first time I read it. (Plus, I really needed to hear it today, too, so bless you!)

  6. Amen to this Shauna.
    Loads of ever so brilliant advise here, shows just how far you have come. I can realts to ALL of it (but I dont live in Scotland, I live in Yorkshire, but its close enough).
    Thanks for the post, its given me a much needed smile.

  7. Thanks Shauna, just what I needed! My thighs and I actually did have a bout with my thighs this morning, and you know what it changed? nothing. It just put me in a terrible mood all morning.

    You list fixed me right up, so thanks!

  8. Wow. I really needed that, b/c I feel like that a lot. It’s hard not to give up or become overwhelmed with the “journey” or the “battle” that I’m facing. Thanks for the post. πŸ™‚ I might have to “steal” it for my blog! LOL

  9. Needed to read that list….and since i’m sure that i’ll need to read it over and over again, lol, i’ve printed it out for my enjoyment.

    Love your blog….

    …and your book even more. <3

  10. Just because you think everything is about your weight, don’t assume everyone else sees it that way. Often other people are much better at seeing past your fat than you are.

    Wow. How’d you know this was the exact answer to the question that’s been bugging me for weeks? You did not repost in vain.

  11. Nothing wrong with a re-post. I think sometimes its important to remind ourselves of the stuff that we learned but may have forgotten. And it’s funny too so even better!

    And totally agree on the total Greek yoghurt – a dieters saviour!

    Also, glad to know things are better for you now – you know my story and how much I’ve been rooting for you.

  12. Dear Shauna,

    You may have heard this a 1000+ times, but your blog is worth every click! It is a great source of information, inspiration and laughs.

    I am from India and I have struggled with my weight for ever and it is deeply affirming to learn about others in my situation who have won the weight loss war or at least won most of the terrain!

    Heres wishing you all the best in everything!


  13. I find it interesting that the topic I share this with you is what it is. πŸ˜€ Blog.

    I wanted to give you a heads up that I’ve started my own blog! Since you have inspired me I wanted to share.

    Just remember your own advice – even if at times you don’t follow it.

  14. I’ve just seen your donut meter. I want one! Really really want a little thing that tells me to eat 19 donuts. What I don’t want to do is track calorie burn. Hmmm. Well done you though – a very positive approach!

  15. Love this! You always make me laugh, Shauna. And I especially agree with the comment about not disappearing up your own arse. Like when I gave up smoking and all I could talk about for weeks was how long it was since I’d had a cigarette and how many cigarettes I hadn’t smoked by then. It’s just not true that you are what you eat! We are all SO MUCH more than that! Food, schmood, who cares, right, so long as it’s basically healthy and the weight’s heading in the right direction? Or that’s the frame of mind I’m currently aiming for… (Just worked out the ciggie data by the way: it’s 10 years since I had one and that means I haven’t smoked 71,000 cigarettes. Looking forward to working out the chocolate equivalent in a few years’ time. What, me, obsessive??)

  16. oh, I hear you, particularly about the lentils before squats and lunges.
    I have the same issue with Pilates, but I always try and pass my toots off as the mat squeaking. Can’t always disguise the smell though.
    Hmmm, think I might go have a listen to your podcast.

  17. I agree, that is a very reassuring list! And realistic. I especially like the part where we needn’t feel like we should chant affirmations to ourselves in the mirror all the time. Just some of the time works well for me. πŸ™‚

    Just listened to the most recent podcast and just loved it. It was the first time I took it on the go (in my iPod rather than listening at home) and it totally made me happy. Amazing what listening to you and Carla can do for a boring subway ride. πŸ˜€

  18. Wow, so many rich insights in one post! I especially like the bits where it’s OK to fail as long as you don’t blog about it!

    I guess blogging can be like journal writing, and I find journal writing is really useful for sorting out many of these issues by writing them down where you can look at them and giving yourself some perspective. You can go crazy inside your own head after awhile!

  19. I TOTALLY DISAGREE. You must chant ‘I AM A WINNER’ to yourself in the mirror at every opportunity. Even in public. Shop windows are ok too.

    BTW, I just read the German diet pill thingo. I know it must be distressing but, you know, a little bit amusing. ‘The men pay attention to me again’?? As if that is the whole point of being alive… Puh.

  20. Love it. Great list. Fage = awesome. And I’m glad to have not put things off til I got skinny (I’d never doing them as I ended up STRONG, not skinny). I need to go back and reread some of my more confident entries to inspire myself. πŸ˜›

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